


Going Home

by befreckledblake



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-19
Updated: 2015-04-19
Packaged: 2018-03-24 16:49:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 828
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3776092
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/befreckledblake/pseuds/befreckledblake
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When they finally break apart, his heart pounding in his chest, his lungs burning for air, he can’t help the small, rueful smile that slowly spreads across his face.</p>
<p>“And to think,” he murmurs breathlessly, gently resting his forehead against hers, “once upon a time, all I wanted to do with your mouth was shut it.”</p>
<p>Prompt: bellarke + "coz all of me loves all of you" from tumblr user kyngbellamy <3</p>
            </blockquote>





	Going Home

_Bellarke + “coz all of me loves all of you”_

  
“Why are you here?”

She’s exhausted, and not just physically. The circles under her eyes are obvious, the gauntness to her cheeks alarmingly prominent, but that’s not what truly gives it away. It’s the blankness in her gaze, like she’s looking at the world but never _seeing_ it. The slump in her shoulders, as if she bears the weight of the world on her small, worn down shoulders; she’s broken, beaten down by the things that she’s done. That _they’ve_ done.

But she bears it all, so that he doesn’t have to.

“Because.”

_I miss you._

_I need you._

_I forgive you._

“Bellamy,” She sighs, already turning away from him, her face so empty of emotion it makes him want to fall to his knees and weep. “Go home.”

_You are my home._

He wants to say it, wants to make her _see_ again, to pull out the beauty in every little thing the way she so easily could once. But the words won’t come. She’s slipping away from him, piece by piece, and all he can do is watch.

“I’m here because I love you.”

She stops, and when she finally turns to face him, it’s with eyes filled with sadness, with a longing that makes him ache.

“Don’t.”

“I do. I love you, Clarke.”

“Stop.” She pleads, and he can see it, just for a moment, that spark of emotion, of something other than despair.

“I _can’t_.” He doesn’t know how long he’s loved her. Maybe since she left and he had to face the world without her, maybe longer. Maybe he’s always loved her. He can’t remember what it’s like not to.

She’s shaking her head, pulling away from him again, so he pushes further.

“I’ve seen the best and worst parts of you, Clarke. Your perfections, your imperfections. And I love them all.” He moves toward her, slowly raising his hands to her face. When she doesn’t pull away, he strokes his fingers gently against her cheek, cupping her face in his hands. “All of me loves all of you.”

“Bellamy-“

He kisses her, rough and desperate, knowing it’s not enough to make her stay. Her fingers find their way into his hair, tugging him, not away but closer, with a desperation that matches his own. He loses himself in her lips, her touch, trying to burn it all into his memory.

When they finally break apart, his heart pounding in his chest, his lungs burning for air, he can’t help the small, rueful smile that slowly spreads across his face.

“And to think,” he murmurs breathlessly, gently resting his forehead against hers, “once upon a time, all I wanted to do with your mouth was shut it.”

She chuckles, but it’s strained, almost as if she’s forgotten how, and when she looks up at him there isn’t a trace of humour in her eyes.

“I can’t go back.” She says, and it’s a goodbye and an apology all in one. “Not now. Maybe not ever.”

“I know. I’m not asking you to.” She closes her eyes again, letting out a soft sigh before resting her head more firmly against his, her fingers tugging him as close as she can.

“You told me to go home.” He begins after a moment, his thumbs brushing against her skin in small, absent motions “I realized that, after you left… The only place that feels like home to me is wherever you are.”

Her eyes snap open, blue and wide and full of panic. “No, Bellamy, you _can’t_ -“

“It’s my choice, Clarke. This is what I want.” He says simply, letting her go when she tries to move away from him.

“What about the others? What about Octavia? You can’t just leave them, I told you I don’t know if I’m ever going back.”

“I can’t protect her anymore.” He runs a hand through his hair, shaking his head. “No, she doesn’t _need_ me to protect her anymore. She can handle herself. Besides,” and he shoots her a resigned look, “she has Lincoln. He’ll look out for her.”

“But…” She chews her lower lip, watching him, confusion and dread and – hope? – flickering so quickly behind her eyes he can’t keep track of it. “I don’t want to be the one to take you away from them.”

He moves closer to her again, reaching for her hand. Enclosing it in both of his, he fixes her with as serious a gaze he can muster. “I told you we would do this together. I’m all in, Clarke. This is what I want.” He watches her a moment, sees the war of emotions on her face. “What do you want?”

She hesitates for only a moment, before pulling him down to place a soft, chaste kiss on his lips.

“You.” She sighs, trying to breathe out all the hurt and pain she still keeps buried deep inside. “I want you.”

_Fin_

**Author's Note:**

> An accidental prompt, more or less. I hope you enjoyed it! <3


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